She Savoured Her Solitude

Half way in and half way out
Never knowing what it's all about
Don't think I'm gonna figure out
Constantly clouded by smoke and doubt

With both ends of a candle burning
Money spent long before earning
Feels like I'm never learning
And all the while I'm yearning
For something more to complete
This past year's hard to beat
The harder it gets the more I retreat
There are no expectations to meet
When I'm by myself, on my own
By now you'd think I'd have grown
But these are the seeds I've sown
Born alone and you die alone


Little more to it then that
I feel safe within this habitat
Take your love, you can have that
Hard enough solo without coming to bat
For you when I know this won't be
Enough to save you let alone me


There's just so, so much to be done
Defeated in this before I've begun
Wars are waged and wars are won,
I'm under covers too tired to run.

You can cover it up and call it romance
You're not fooling me into your dance
Got a foolproof way that I can enhance
My mood so alone I'm taking a stance
Nothing gets to me the way men do
It doesn't matter if it's him or you
But something in me starts to unscrew
When you stop chasing and I start to pursue


Little more to it then that
I feel safe within this habitat
Take your love, you can have that
Hard enough solo without coming to bat
For you when I know this won't be
Enough to save you let alone me
Pain's less alone smoking tree
So please, fuck off and let me be.